Fundamentals of Marketing

I received this forward from a friend years ago when I was ignorant about marketing. Reading it again now has made me realize how true all this is.

Enjoy.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, “I’m fantastic in bed.”
-That’s Direct Marketing.

You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, “He’s fantastic in bed.”
-That’s Advertising.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say, “Hi, I’m fantastic in bed.”
-That’s Telemarketing.

You’re at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie; you walk up to her and pour her a drink. You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her a ride, and then say, “By the way, I’m fantastic in bed.”
-That’s Public Relations.

You’re at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says, “I hear you’re fantastic in bed.”
-That’s Brand Recognition.

You walk into a party and shout at the top of your lungs “I’m fantastic in bed.”
-That’s Mass Marketing.

You decide to go to a party and tell any gorgeous girls that you’re fantastic in bed.
-That’s a Marketing Plan.

You are at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You walk up to her and say “I’m fantastic in bed… but don’t tell my wife.”
-That’s Market Share.

You are at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You ask her friends if she likes blokes who are fantastic in bed.
-That’s Market Research.

You’re at a party and see two gorgeous girls. You tell one girl “I’m fantastic in bed” and you tell another “I’m a sensitive lover”
-That’s Market Segmentation.

You are at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You walk up to her and say “I’m fantastic in bed… but only on Wednesdays, with the light on, and listening to Pavarotti’s greatest hits.”
-That’s Niche Marketing.

You are at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You walk up to her and………….
-That’s Market Penetration!